You spent years giving everything—your time, energy, sleep, dreams—for your children. You stayed up through fevers, packed lunches through exhaustion, and cheered them on at school plays or college graduations with tears in your eyes. You didn’t do it for praise—you did it out of love.

So why, now that they’re grown, does it feel like you’ve vanished from their lives?

If you’ve found yourself staring at a silent phone, wondering when your last heartfelt conversation took place, you’re not alone. Across the country, thousands of aging parents quietly wonder: Where did the closeness go?

This painful shift in adult parent-child relationships is more common than we like to admit. And for those over 60, it often comes with a double sting—emotional distance, paired with a deep, aching silence.

Whether it’s unanswered calls, being brushed aside, or even outright disrespect, here’s what to do when your adult children no longer show the love and attention you deserve.

1. Start by Acknowledging the Hurt
It’s easy to dismiss your own feelings. You may tell yourself you’re being “too sensitive” or that you shouldn’t take it personally. But ignoring the pain only makes it worse.

You are allowed to feel heartbroken when the child you raised no longer seems to see you. Hurt, sadness, anger, even grief—these emotions are real and valid.

Naming those feelings doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.

And recognizing your emotions is the first step toward healing.

2. Set Boundaries—Even With Your Own Children